Interpersonal competence is one of the five keys to career and life success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success. If you want to become interpersonally competent, you need to do three things: 1) get to know yourself, what you like and don’t like, your strengths and weaknesses; 2) build strong relationships with the people you meet; and 3) resolve conflict positively.
The August 2008 issue of Women’s Edge Magazine arrived in my mail box this week. As usual, it has some great, common sense advice – not just for women, but for anyone who wants to succeed.
In the past, I’ve suggested that you go to www.womensedgemagazine.com and subscribe. Have you done so? If you have, please leave a comment telling us what you think about this publication.
I bring up Women’s Edge today, because I found three articles in the latest issue that dealt, in one way or another, with interpersonal competence.
In “Breaking Up Is Hard To Do,” Kim Mills discusses what to do when you are asked to leave a company. Among other things, she makes the following point, “Act in a dignified manner. Treat everyone involved with respect, including the messenger.” I know you might be thinking, “treat them with respect!??!! No way, the SOBs just fired me.” However, if you maintain your dignity in even the most trying of circumstances, you’ll find that you’ll be better able to build and maintain relationships at your job.
In “Lost Our Moral Compass,” Deidre Hughey encourages us to “sell ethically.” She says, “Let’s be sure to treat each other with dignity and respect. Let’s make sure that all of our dealings with others are meant to benefit each other and not take advantage of weaknesses and vulnerabilities.” I agree. Ethical behavior, dignity and respect are the hallmarks of interpersonally competent people.
In “TYB (Train Your Brain) People Get Better, Not Bitter!” Susan Hite suggests that when you are mistreated by another person, you need to, “Treat others the way you WISH you had been treated. There is nothing more powerful than deciding that others will not have to go through what you endured.” Susan is right on too. Interpersonally competent people don’t look to get even, they find ways to build creative solutions out of conflict, disagreement and disappointment.
Susan offers great advice for those of us seeking to become more interpersonally competent. “What bitter experiences have you had that can help others live a better life? Turn passion and/or pity into positive power, and you will get better too.” I agree. All of the interpersonally competent people I know are positive people.
Do you see why I love Women’s Edge Magazine? These three pieces of advice alone are worth the cost of an entire year’s subscription.
The common sense point here is simple. Successful people are interpersonally competent. As the articles in this month’s Women’s Edge Magazine point out, interpersonally competent people treat others with dignity and respect – even in the most trying of circumstances. Interpersonally competent people act ethically – especially in the times when no one else is around and watching. Interpersonally competent people don’t look for ways to get even. They look for ways to channel their hurt and disappointment into positive action.
That’s my thinking on interpersonal competence and this month’s issue of Women’s Edge Magazine. What’s yours? Please leave a comment telling us what you think. As I’ve said many times, I appreciate and value all of your comments. Thanks for reading – and writing.
Bud
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