
Today is Monday, so this post is on self confidence.
In previous posts, I have commented that fear is the enemy of self confidence. Lorraine Cohen is a business consultant and life strategist. In her e book, Fearless: 7 Keys to Turning Mountains Into Mole Hills, she identifies the 12 most common fears that keep people from getting what they want in life.
This is a great list. I suggest you take a few minutes and read it. Which of these 12 apply to you? What can you do to overcome them?
- Fear of failure – based on the old idea that everything we do has to be entirely successful and that there even is such a thing as a real failure!
- Fear of success – success could mean more responsibility, more attention, abundance, and a continued pressure to perform at a high level. Many of us are taught to be prepared for failure and not success.
- Fear of being judged – comes from the need for approval, which evolves from childhood.
- Fear of emotional pain – fear of the severity and ability to handle or survive the pain.
- Fear of embarrassment – feelings associated with making mistakes, being human and shame by empowering others to judge us.
- Fear of abandonment and/or being alone – feelings of grief and loss that tie into feelings of rejection and self worth.
- Fear of rejection – personalizing the responses and behaviors of others in a way that is taken to heart when we take a social of professional risk.
- Fear of expressing our true feelings – lack of clear, direct communication ruins both personal and business relationships.
- Fear of intimacy – getting too close to people and letting them know and see the “real you”. Brings up thoughts like “if you really get to know me, you won’t love/like/want me. Tied to self worth and strong fears of rejection.
- Fear of the unknown – needless worry and speculative anxieties, what ifs. Imaginative perceptions of things that most often never materialize. Expecting the worst, not the best.
- Fear of loss – related to the fear of pain associated with no longer having something or someone of personal emotional significance.
- Fear of death – related to the fear of loss. Focuses on the question, “what will happen to me when I die?”
Numbers 1 (Fear of Failure), 3 (Fear of Being Judged) and 5 (Fear of Embarrassment) resonate with me. I have had to work hard to overcome these fears. However, the work has paid off. It’s led me to where I am today – a successful small business owner.
Which of these 12 resonate for you? What are you going to do about them?
That’s it for today. Thanks for reading. Log on to my website www.BudBilanich.com for more common sense. Check out my other blog: www.CommonSenseGuy.com for common sense advice on leading people and running a small business.
I’ll see you around the web, and at Alex’s Lemonade Stand.
Bud
PS: Speaking of Alex’s Lemonade Stand – my fundraising page is still open. Please go to www.FirstGiving.com/TheCommonSenseGuy to read Alex’s inspiring story and to donate if you can.








Hiya Bud,
Thanks for posting the list from my free fear e-course. Fear of failure, success, and the unknown are also biggies for many people. Ones I used to resonate with! The hard work really pays off! Here's a little tip for your readers.... If you find yourself stuck in mental chatter (the neagtive self-talk), take a deep breath, look around the room and notice what's in your immediate environment. Put your attention on the things around you and count each thing you see such as looking at the clock (1), then the plant (2), then the tv (3)and so on for a minute or two. This quick exercise will bring you right into the present moment and out of your head. I learned this from a book called Resurfacing by Harry Palmer. Works great.
To your success in being fearless!
Lorraine
www.powerfull-living.biz
Posted by: Lorraine Cohen | November 20, 2006 7:40 PM | Permalink to Comment