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Sep27
Becoming a Great Conversationalist

Today is Thursday, so this post is on Communication Skills.

The Fine Art of Small Talk is one of the most read books in my library.  Debra Fine, the author and friend of mine, presents some great ideas on how to become a great conversationalist.  Conversation skills are an important communication skill that all stars have mastered.

Here is a sampling of the common sense advice Ms. Fine dispenses in the book...

How to Build Conversation Skills

  • • Join and participate in professional organizations, service organizations, clubs and other group activities in order to develop new business friendships and meet new people.
  • Make it a point to meet at least three new people at every meeting, party or other event you attend.
  • Initiate conversation with people you don’t know.  Be friendly first.  People will respond to you.
  • At social events, find an approachable person.  Make eye contact.  Smile.  Offer your name.  Use their name.
  • Ask a person’s name if you’ve forgotten it.
  • Reintroduce yourself to someone who is likely to have forgotten your name.
  • Look for common goals, interests and experiences with people you meet.
  • Take turns in conversations so you can learn about others and help them get to know you.
  • Be enthusiastic – about the conversation, and life in general.
  • When someone asks “what’s new?”  Talk about something that is exciting in your life – don’t say “nothing much”.
  • Use open ended questions to keep a conversation going.  Tell me about…?  How did you…?  What was that like for you…?  What brought you to…?  Why?
  • Show the other person you’re interested in what he or she has to say.  Lean forward.  Maintain eye contact.  Open your arms, relax your body.  Nod and smile.
  • Gracefully change the topic of conversation when one topic has run its course.
  • Include everyone in a group conversation.
  • When you tell a story, make the main point first, then add the details.
  • Things to avoid: bragging about yourself; one-upsmanship; monopolizing the conversation; interrupting the other person; being a know it all; giving unwanted or un-asked-for advice.

I know there’s a lot of advice here.  However, you don’t have to learn and use it all at once.  Pick one or two things to focus on and master, then move on until you’ve mastered the entire list.  Once you’ve mastered all (or most) of these tips, you’ll be a better conversationalist – and a better communicator.

That’s it for today.  Thanks for reading.  Log on to my other blogs: www.CommonSenseGuy.com for common sense advice on leading people and running a business, and www.CommonSenseDay.com to learn more about Use Your Common Sense Day -- November 4, and to read stories of common sense in action; and my website www.BudBilanich.com for more common sense.

I’ll see you around the web, and at Alex’s Lemonade Stand.

Bud

PS: Speaking of Alex’s Lemonade Stand – my fundraising page is still open.  Please go to www.FirstGiving.com/TheCommonSenseGuy to read Alex’s inspiring story and to donate if you can.

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1 Comments/Trackbacks




Awesome advise. I will have to start using some of it myself. I have always been shy of talking to strangers...will give it a shot now. Thanks,

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